"Is this your first year in Swine?" asks a proud father of a 4-H'er, whose son is showing his hog right now to the judges. The show pen's full of swine and young teenage boys and girls.
"Yes, it is," I say.
"Yes, this is our first show," Annie says.
The father proceeds to tell us many details in the World of Swine. The correct posture of the pigs. Good definition of the loins of the animals. How the children are judged on their ability to control their pigs. Annie and I are enthralled.
Annie and I are big fan of pigs. Actually Annie likes anything that is a baby or an infant. Baby pigs, baby sheep, baby goats. Baby cows are her favorite. When we go driving in the country outside of Tucson, she will stream 'Baby Cows' when she sees a calf on the range. I joke with her that I've lost part of my hearing in my right ear, due to her high pitched exclamations.
I've been a fan of pigs much of my life, as well, it coming to a head in Art School, when I creating an entire line of ceramic Pig Noses. A Mosha Diane pig nose with a patch over one nostril. A Fourth of July pig nose with two small holes for the placement of sparklers. A J.J. Cale pig nose, with a clay coke spoon attached to the side of the nose, with fake cocaine included. Even a pig nose cremation urn. Lots and lots of pig noses. I suppose I was doing all those pig things in the late 70's because I was living next to a hog farm at the time, and hogs do tend to make an impression. Or it could be that I was smoking a lot of dope. Who knows. Either way, I've always loved pigs and one of my favorite things to do is go see hogs at the county fair and this year, Im here for a 4 H competition.
Annie and I are having big time fun. They are beautiful animals to us.
After a while, the blue ribbons are given out and Annie and I make our way past the sheep and the goats on our way to the midway. We split a bratwurst and French fries, but decide to wait on the funnel cake until on our way out of the fair. After dinner, we wipe out hands on the meager napkin we were given and head for the lights of The Midway. In the past we have played some skeeball for fun and a couple of years ago, I won Annie a tiny stuffed frog, for shooting water into a clown's head faster than the guy next to me. Annie acted impressed as I gave her the prize. She was polite. I tried to see it as a big deal, me winning my girl a stuffed animal at the county fair, but we both knew it was just a tiny stuffed frog, not a large animal that you see other boyfriends lugging around. But Annie at the time, graciously accepted the frog and gave me a kiss.
We pass the games of chances on our way to the rides. Games like 'Throw a dime and have it stick to the top of a slick glass plate' (next to impossible to do), 'Shoot a basketball through a hoop that is smaller than regulation.' (really difficult), 'Shoot a BB gun at a red star so that none of the red remains' (just give the guy your money and walk away, it's so damn hard to do) and 'Walk up a rope ladder that is anchored only at two points' (again, ridiculously difficult).
I see a new game, at least new to me. 'Buy 3 darts for $5 and hit the red paper star'. A sister game to the BB star game. The red star looks like an anorexic version of a real red star. Extremely narrow points, no body really to speak of. Above the impossible stars are a couple of dozen very large tan stuffed dogs and above the dogs are about 6 huge four foot tall teddy bears, as big as a small child. The dogs are pretty cute. Ah, what the hell? It's only five bucks, and I'll earn points for trying. Annie loves large plush stuffed animals almost as much as she likes baby real ones.
"I think I'm going to try the darts" I say to Annie. "Put to use those years of throwing darts in bars in the '70s."
"Really? You going to try this?" she says.
"Sure," I say as I give the carny a five dollar bill.
"One dart gets you a small toy" he says pointing to his equivalent of a tiny stuffed frog, "Two darts get you the big dog. Three gets you the big bear."
"Gotcha" I say.
I grab one of the darts and I remember from years ago, my dart technique. Put the point of the dart where you want it to go. I line up the point with the center of the midget star. I let it fly. I lands right in the center of the star.
"Would you look at that?" I say.
"Honey, you hit it!" Annie says excitedly.
"One more and you get the dog," the carny says.
I line it up again. Same place. Center of the star. Let go and follow through. The dart hits one of the points of the stars. In the red.
"I won, I won the dog!" I say.
"You won, honey! You won!" Annie says.
"If you get the last dart in, you win the bear," says the carnival man.
I look at the enormous bear. I don't want the bear. It's just too damn big. I look over at Annie and she doesn't look like she wants the bear either. We're happy with the dog. I let fly the last dart, kind of looking, kind of not. I misses the star. I don't care.
"Would you like to buy three more darts and try for the bear?" says the man.
"No, no, no... I'm fine with that one," pointing to the big tan stuffed dog that sort of resembles a Shar Pei.
He reaches up with a stick, brings down the dog and gives it to Annie, and she hugs it like she was a four year old girl. She starts to tear up a little.
"No one's ever won me a big prize before," she says blinking back the tears.
I'm misting up now too.
"And I've never won a big fair prize for a girl either." I say.
Annie give me a big kiss, full on the lips.
And then the three of us, Annie, The Big Dog, and I, have a big group hug.